`~` b L u E z `~` ``` superb definitiOns ```

 

SUPERB Definitions

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco
Rolled in paper
With fire at one end
And a fool at the other!



MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement
Wherein
A man loses his bachelor degree
And a woman gains her master



LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information
From the notes of the lecturer
To the notes of students
Without passing through the minds
Of either


CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man
Multiplied by the
Number present


COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing
A cake in such a way that
Everybody believes
He got the biggest piece


TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which
Masculine will power is
Defeated by feminine water-power!


DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes
Before marriage


CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks,
Nobody listens
And everybody disagrees later on


ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel
You are going to feel
A feeling
You have never felt before


CLASSIC:
A book
Which people praise,
But never read


SMILE:
A curve
That can set
A lot of things straight!


OFFICE:
A place
Where you can relax
After your strenuous
Home life


YAWN:
The only time
When some married men
Ever get to open
Their mouth


ETC:
A sign
To make others believe
That you know
More than
You actually do


COMMITTEE:
Individuals
Who can do
Nothing individually
And sit to decide
That nothing can be done
Together


EXPERIENCE:
The name
Men give
To their
Mistakes


ATOM BOMB:
An invention
To bring an end
To all
Inventions


PHILOSOPHER:
A fool
Who torments himself
During life,
To be spoken of
When dead


DIPLOMAT:
A person
Who tells you
To go to hell
In such a way
That you actually look forward
To the trip


OPPORTUNIST:
A person
Who starts taking bath
If he
Accidentally falls
Into a river


OPTIMIST:
A person
Who while falling
From EIFFEL TOWER
Says in midway
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"


PESSIMIST:
A person
Who says that
O is the last letter
In ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
In OPPORTUNITY


MISER:
A person
Who lives poor
So that
He can die RICH!


FATHER:
A banker
Provided by
Nature


CRIMINAL:
A guy
No different
From the other,
Unless he gets caught


BOSS:
Someone
Who is early
When you are late
And late
When you are early


POLITICIAN:
One who
Shakes your hand
Before elections
And your Confidence
Later


DOCTOR:
A person
Who kills
Your ills
By pills,
And kills you
By his bills!

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