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[EnjoyTheMasti] Humor As we grow older

 

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  Couple  in their nineties are  both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the  doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want  to start writing things down to help  them remember  .. 
Later  that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his  chair.
'Want  anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he  asks. 
'Will  you get me a bowl of ice cream?' 
'Sure..' 
'Don't  you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she  asks. 
'No,  I can remember it..' 
'Well,  I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it  down, so as not to forget it?' 
He  says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with  strawberries.' 
'I'd  also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it  down?' she asks. 
Irritated,  he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice  cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness  sake!' 
Then  he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20  minutes,  The  old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon  and eggs.. She stares at the plate for a  moment.
'Where's  my toast ?'
  =============================================================
  An  elderly couple had  dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left  the table and went into the  kitchen. 
The  two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to  a new restaurant and it was really great... I would recommend it  very highly.' 
  
  The  other man said, 'What is the name of the  restaurant?' 
  
  The  first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of  that flower you give to someone you  love? 
You  know.... The one that's red and has  thorns.' 
  
  'Do  you mean a rose?'
  
  'Yes,  that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen  and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to  last night?'
 ================================================================= 
  Hospital  regulations require  a wheel chair for patients being  discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly  gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at  his feet, who insisted he didn't  need my help to leave the  hospital. 
  
  After  a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to  the elevator. 
On  the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting  him.
  
  'I  don't know,' he said. 'She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing  out of her hospital gown.'
 ==============================================================
   
  A  senior citizen said  to his eighty-year old buddy: 
'So  I hear you're getting married?' 
'Yep!' 
'Do  I know her?' 
'Nope!' 
'This  woman, is she good looking?' 
'Not  really.' 
'Is  she a good cook?' 
'Naw,  she can't cook too well.' 
'Does  she have lots of money?' 
'Nope!  Poor as a church mouse.' 
'Well,  then, is she good in bed?' 
'I  don't know.' 
'Why  in the world do you want to marry her then?
'Because  she can still drive!'
  ==============================================================
  Three  old guys are  out walking. 
First  one says, 'Windy, isn't it?' 
Second  one says, 'No, it's Thursday!'
Third  one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer..'
=============================================================  
  A  man was  telling his neighbor, 'I just bought a new  hearing  aid.
It  cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art.. It's  perfect.' 
  
  'Really,'  answered the neighbor . 'What kind  is it?'
  
  'Twelve  thirty..'
 ================================================================ 
  Morris ,  an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a  physical. 
A  few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a  gorgeous young woman on his arm.
  
  A  couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're  really doing great, aren't you?'
  
Morris  replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be  cheerful.''
  
  The  doctor said, 'I didn't say that.. I said, 'You've got a heart  murmur; be careful.'
=================================================================  
  One  more. . .! 
A  little old man shuffled  slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly,  painfully, up onto a stool... After catching his breath, he ordered  a banana split. 
  
  The  waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed  nuts?' 
'No,'  he replied, 'Arthritis.' 
  
   
  Now, before you  ' forget ', send them on  to some other folks you know
Who could use a good laugh  !! 


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