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[WowMailz] Santa - Banta Jokes

 

 
 

 

 

Santa sent SMS to his BOSS: Me sick, no work. Boss SMS back: When I am sick I kiss my wife try it. Two hours later Santa sms 2 boss: Me ok, ur wife very sweet.   ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* Santa ki chatri me hole tha, kisine pucha, umbrella mein hole kyu? Sardar bola: Oye barish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega.   ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Santa: Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs & marriage age 21yrs? Banta: Govt. ko pata hai ki desh sambhalna aasan hai, lekin biwi ko nahi. ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Banta: Pareshan lag rahe ho. Santa: Yaar baap ban ne wala hu. Banta: Yeh to khushi ki baat hai. Santa: Lekin biwi ko nahi pata. ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Santa bada dukhi tha, kisi ne pucha itni tension me kyon ho? Santa: Ek dost ko 3 lac plastic surgery k liye diye the, ab use pehchan nahin pa raha   ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   ********* THE BEST ONE ! ! ! ! ! Driver: Sir ji, petrol khatam ho gaya , gaadi aage nahi ja sakti. Banta: Chalo Phir, wapis le chalo. ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Santa: Wo dekh teri biwi ko saanp kaat raha hai. Banta: Are tension mat le, Jeher bharwane aya hoga...   ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Banta: Kal Muje 10 logo ne Peeta. Santa: Phir tune kya kiya? Banta: Maine kaha salon ek-ek karke aao. Santa: Phir? Banta: Phir kya, Salon ne ek-ek karke dubara Peeta !     ************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* *********   Inspector to Banta: Faansi se pehle, bata teri antim ichha kya hai? Banta: Mere pair upar aur sir neeche kar k faansi de do..!

Pramod Ambady
            Romeo Never Dies           
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[WowMailz] Fw: Beautiful Deer Horn Photos (P1)

[WowMailz] Awesome Sunshine Photos

[WowMailz] Animals In News

 

 
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Asian elephant Luk Chai chases a large football around his enclosure at Taronga Zoo, in New South Wales

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10 day old cheetah cub Kiburi opens his eyes, San Diego Zoo Safari Park Animal Care Centre

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A lion named Stefani plays with her one-month-old lion cub in their enclosure at Sofia Zoo

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An adult sea otter mother swims with her pup on her chest in the Inian Pass, in the Pacific Ocean, off Southeastern Alaska. Photographer Michael Nolan captured the attentive mother caressing her pup while effortlessly backstroking through serene water.

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A baby white-naped mangabey monkey (Cercocebus atys lunulatus), born on November 7, is held by its keeper at the Bioparco Zoo in Rome after it was rejected by its mother

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First-time mother Mjukuu places a giant protective hand over her unnamed five-week-old baby son at London Zoo

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This may look like a creature from a Harry Potter movie - at first glance it looks like a bull has sprouted wings and is about to lift off. The amusing picture was snapped as the bull was chased by a crane, the tallest flying bird in the world. The sight was caught on camera at Keoladeo National Park, in Rajasthan, India, by photographer Jagdeep Rajput, who said people had compared it to Pegasus, the mythical winged horse.

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A weird double lizard with two heads has been caught in Rong'an County in southern China's Guangxi Province. Zheng Tuxiu says it was caught by her pet cat: "I was scared by the alien stuff it [the cat] brought home." Curious residents have now been flocking to her home in order to take a look at the unusual creature.

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A pink katydid is seen in this photograph by Carol Freeman. Its unusual colour is the result of a genetic mutation known as erythrism, similar to the recessive gene that afflicts albino animals

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This white duck was snapped coming in to land yesterday against the snow - and all that can be seen are its orange beak and legs and its two black eyes. Photographer and artist Robert Fuller was out near his home in Yorkshire when he spotted the mallard.

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A pelican plays with an empty beer bottle, thinking it is a fish. The sight was captured by Mary Trebilco as she holidayed in Batemans Bay in New South Wales, Australia. She said the bird appeared to be fascinated with the bottle's shiny exterior: "I think he was attracted by the shine and colour, although I don't know why because fish don't usually come in bright green. He dropped it from his mouth but managed to pick it up again and seemed content to let it nestle in his bill for a while."

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In years to come this small kingfisher will no doubt talk wistfully of the "one that got away". For despite its best efforts the greedy bird was unable to snatch the large fish that was lying enticingly in a net....

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...quickly realising the futility of the action the disgruntled bird eventually had give up on the easy meal. Instead it dived down to snatch its own fishy snack from the water - one that was easier to carry

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Young tigers try to capture a chicken at Jiufeng Forest Zoo in Wuhan, Hubei province, China

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A black leopard is pictured at the Rhino and Lion Nature Reserve in Johannesburg, South Africa. The old adage that a leopard can never change its spots is not always true. Black leopards of Africa and Asia are commonly confused with the pumas of South America. Both have dark, or melanistic fur but they retain faintly visible spots.

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Walker, a 23 month old polar bear who arrived from Holland's Rhenen Zoo two weeks ago, experiences snow for the first time in Kingussie, Scotland

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Baby panda Fu Hu is weighed at Vienna's Schoenbrunn Zoo. The name, meaning Happy Tiger, was chosen via an online vote in which more than 25,000 people took part

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A ring-tailed lemur sits at the table during its Thanksgiving feast at San Francisco Zoo

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Pramod Ambady
            Romeo Never Dies           
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